by Amanda Weir-Gertzog
please let me explain
this is a mindful path
not a brain breakdown
paint me plain
caught between silences –
i slip into a trance of
(nod-yes-nod-yes-nod-yes)
repeat smile and release.
my slip-slithery skin
accustomed to constant
accommodations in
north south east and western
winding whirling ways —
rarely turns inward and
not enough for me to breathe.
calls for detente
clamor from my
cramping
internal compass
this is need
not just want
plying shy
striated emotion
please let me explain
this is a mindful path
not a brain breakdown
i need stable shoring
not a gurney away
from my expanding roots
if you cannot fathom
a version of me
without you standing
front and center
glorious and shining —
it’s okay
if you step away
(nod-yes-nod-yes-nod-yes)
because now it’s my time
to paint it plain
[previously published on Medium.com]
yawning petals
yellow wallpaper
bearded irises fuzzy
with 70s shag carpet
caterpillar tongues
unfurling like Slinkies
from their gaping
gullets
petals yawn open
cheek to cheek
to fleur de lis cheek
to pliant Gumby lean
necks whose glossy
green sheen arms disco
the night away with
Studio 54 hangers on
planted in their next door
neighbors city soil
day breaks as duos
and trios of bearded iris
entanglements roll from
their patchouli oil-dabbed
futons to trill Chelsea
Morning with the silky
butterscotch sun
my Iris
remains beside me
nestled in
splendiferous dawn
light and lithe
on the wind-whipped
subway garden
platforms —
we tree pose
side by side
soundless Buddhas
wanting (not wanting)
for nourishment
[previously published on Medium.com as Yellow Wallpaper and Gumby Green]
© Amanda Weir-Gertzog
Amanda Weir-Gertzog (she/her) is a neuroqueer poet from New York who lives, writes, and edits in the American South. A nap goddess and bookworm, she basks in the wonder of sweet tea, silliness, and cozy gray cardigans.
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